Designated Sidekick

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I’m borrowing a small passage quoted by Karen’s much better post “Person vs Persona, Or, INSTITUTIONAL SEXISM LOLZ!!”

ETA: As Karen points out, the quote was in need of repairs

“Then I go back in and balloon the s*** out of it, keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho butt with a balloon. NEVER!!” Bendis laughed.”

I think I fear this quote more than our misquote.

…Then I go back in and delete the s*** out of it, keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho butt with a balloon. NEVER!!” Bendis laughed.

So, let’s go quoting, round 2

Question 1. Why do these guys never have poodle fetishes?

Then I go back in and balloon the s*** out of it, keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho poodle with a balloon. NEVER!!” Bendis laughed.

Or bananas?

Then I go back in and balloon the s*** out of it, keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho banana with a balloon. NEVER!!” Bendis laughed.

Or Male Crotches?

Then I go back in and balloon the s*** out of it, keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho crotch with a balloon. NEVER!!” Bendis laughed.

Or actually stick to their promise of “go back in and delete the s*** out of it”. Since they’re “keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho ass with a balloon”, Bendis is clearly keeping the shit in the comic.

The money quote for me remains “keeping in mind to never cover up a Cho butt with a balloon.”. Look, Bendis, buddy, can i call you Bendy? It’s probably nice for you that you’ve got a fetish for the sketched fantasy asses produced by your coworker, but dude, seriously, fetishism on your own time, not on the clock at Marvel.

You’re meant to be writing a comic book here, not a ChoButt spotters guide. Knowing that your stated priority is ensuring pencil and ink butt gets space in the panel does not fill me with confidence in the forthcoming work of Mighty Avengers.

Knowing this though, we have a new benchmark to play with in the forthcoming Mighty Avengers! ChoButts In Disguise!

If the butts are that important, will we get Captain America’s US-A grade tush? How about the Hulk? What say a bit of Spiderbutt? IronButtman? Thor’s got the body of a god, so he’d have an ass to match, right?

If there’s a word bubble hiding a Bendy-buddy Chobutts in the series, the reader gains 10 Chobutt points! Highest scorer gets to be thoroughly dismayed the hidden (word) bubble butts!

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Vertigo Makes Complete First Issue Classics Available for Free
November 10, 2006

Now you can read the full first issues of the many Vertigo series that revolutionized comics! Follow the links below to download a PDF version of the first issue of these classic Vertigo series now collected in graphic novel form. When you visit the Graphic Novels section of VertigoComics.com, any graphic novel titles with a #1 icon () will have a download of the ground-breaking first issue!

http://www.dccomics.com/news/?nw=6186

Not sure how long it’ll last, what sort of madness will ensue, and whether I’ll be to blame for linking you to the fresh powdery sugary sweet crack of comics, but hey, they’re out there, free and comic book like.

DS

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Shout out to fellow traveller of the comicverse, Save Cassandra Cain. It’s a site dedicated to the character of Cassandra Cain, (aka Batgirl) who is also the latest victim of the “Walking Plot Device” syndrome that afflicts DC characters.

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Here’s a hint for the defenders of comic books against accusations of anything.

Incompetence is not a defence.

Now I know this is a complex concept, so I’ll explain it again.

Incompetence is not a defence.

Here’s the detailed explanation

If somebody writing or drawing a comic book has shown, over time, a demonstrable inability to draw different female characters, this is not something you defend by saying “Well, what do you expect? The artist is talentless and incompetent”. This is something where you say “We would like the artist replaced by someone with the appropriate skills required for the job”.

In the same manner, when faced with yet another storyline with a poor portrayal of female characters, justifying the portrayal as “bad writing” and saying “Well, this author is known for their low quality work, poor characterisations, and general inability to create female characters that are equally realistic as the male characters” is not a justification. It’s a reason to request the removal of the author and replacement with the requisite skill set to do the job properly.

Defending misogyny, racism, sexism, homophobia, discriminatory writing, abusive writing, or any other criticism of a text by saying “What do you expect? The author/artist is incompetent” is not actually a defence. Incompetence is not a justification, it’s a request for the person you are allegedly defending to be stood down from their position until they acquire the requisite skills and abilities to do their job properly.